A whole lot of mistakes and the thing with Lucy's luck
by Pink-Wand-Witch
Summary: Mistakes and psychopaths meet with the damned Luck of Lucy and the femal anatomy, things get out of hand and Lucy's finding herself knee-deep in shit. Or ankle-high in bugs. Now she just has to get out of this death trap, find Natsu, apologize and hope for a Happy Ending. And maybe she should over think the names of her future babies.


I do not own Fairy Tail.

**A whole lot of mistakes and the thing with Lucy's luck**

It was a beautiful day in Magnolia. The sun was shining brightly and you could hear the merchants on the local market announcing their merchandises. In the park, mothers sat on the banks, watching their children playing around carelessly and talking to each other. Some had a book or knitting utensils with them. The birds chirped happily and flew through the warm sunny morning without a care in the world. The bells of the cathedral chirmed merrily and invited to the morning fair, carts were rolling down the streets busily, the few animals on the market were busy meowing or mooing or barking, whatever they did. The rivers in the city were plashing and in their surface the sun was reflecting. People on the streets were greeting each other and from the other side of the town, where the guild Fairy Tail stood you could hear merry shouting and singing. In a nutshell, it was a wonderful, merry, happy day, and-

"Goddamnit let me sleep!" I roared and threw the blanket over my head. I haven't slept the whole night, rolling around and cursing the damn female anatomy. Now finally, I was thinking, I could be in the state where I was tired enough to ignore the cramps and finally fall into sleep but nooooooo, the damn birds had started making noise, and those goddamned merchants were shouting so even the oldest, deafest habitant of Magnolia knew that they had the best apples in an area of fifty miles.

I don't even care about that! I buy the cheapest apples I can get and hope they aren't too crappy; it most likely would end in Natsu's stomach anyway! So why, tell me, why they have to shout it so loud that, the inhabitants of the fifty miles all know, that they are the best apples in these fifty miles!

And then these animals! I've heard enough animal-noises to fill fifty miles of animal-noises lacrimas for kids with it! I've actually seen those in a shop on Apple Alley a few days ago, maybe I can ask for a job as the 'animal-noises lacrima filler' there. It would at least get me a few jewels.

I roll around groaning again. Another thing I have to worry about. No matter how many hot-water bottles I take, the cramps won't vanish! How can I go on a mission with the team! How do I get the money if I don't go? Before, I always had luck, I found an excuse for the others why I can't go and I had enough money from the missions before but I won't have that much luck until forever!

I stopped on that thought. Until forever… I didn't even plan on being in Fairy Tail forever! I mean, I still wanted to be a member and stuff but one day, I wanted to have my own house with a white picket fence and a perfect garden and my family and a husband and two kids, Yumi Layla and Haru Michael. I frowned. Maybe I had to over think the names again. But back to the point, where did that thought of 'until forever' come from?

I sighed and decided to let that thought drop for now. I didn't plan on leaving Fairy Tail at the moment and I had neither the money nor the man for my plans right now. I sweat-dropped. I completely forgot about the man.

"Maybe I really should try out dating." I murmured under my breath. But at the moment, between all the missions and my constant rent problem, I didn't even have the time for a relationship! If I had a boyfriend he would have to be really flexible and patient with me. I pondered on that thought….

"That wouldn't be bad at all!" I cried out. "Patient and flexible….that are both really important things a man should be! I mean, I need my space after all and we wouldn't fight over stupid thinks when he would be like that. Well, he should be very caring and loving as well and always happy when I'm around him! And he never should start getting bored by me, always finding new things to love… also, he got to be very understanding, I don't need someone who can't respect my different sides and is always nagging at me. And of course, he should be intellectual so we can talk with each other for years and we never get bored of it, and he has to love books! Oh god that would be sooooo good…" I hugged my pillow and stared dreamy-eyed into space, which would be my closet on the other side of the room.

"What are you _talking_ about?" Natsu said behind me. Normally, I wouldn't have been scared anymore, considering how often I found him sitting on my window sill, about to break in another time but this once I seemed to be so lost in my mind that I found myself screaming, and pummeling to the floor as I lost my balance when I had sprung up, clutching the pillow I was recently cuddling like a guy I wanted to strangle.

Natsu looked down on me and broke into laughers. I huffed and stood up, finally letting go of the poor pillow which was now adorned with a dent.

"NATSU! That is NOT funny you baka!" I screamed at him. Natsu ignored me though and fell onto my bed because of laughing so much. I regretted putting the bed under the window. It would've been more beautiful if Natsu would have fallen onto the floor.

"Stop laughing!" I screamed while blushing fifty shades of red and picked up the pillow again. Then I hit the Dragon Slayer as hard as I could. Natsu forced himself to a slight giggle and gave me a bewildered look.

"A pillow doesn't hurt weirdo" he giggled and broke into full-blown laughers again. I smiled as I saw his weak spot. He was so busy laughing that he didn't see the creepy grin on my face otherwise he would have fled already.

"You sure of that?" I asked him and next thing he knew, he was strangled by a pillow. He started to scream in the pillow but it muffled his voice.

"What was that? I can't hear you~" I sang. But then, Natsu grabbed my hips – I blushed and thought at the same time that next time I had to somehow restrain his hands- and he flipped me over, causing me to lose my grip on the pillow over his mouth.

Normally I would have fought back as good as I could but it was that time of the month and the contact with the bed, even if it was soft, sent a spasm of cramps through my stomach. I winced and of course, Natsu noticed it. He stopped immediately.

"Did I hurt you" he breathed. In his eyes shimmered something between guilt, self-hate and incredulity. I knew that his biggest fear was ever hurting someone special to him or failing to protect them.

My first instinct was to caress his cheek and smile at him, signaling him that everything was fine and he shouldn't worry, but firstly, I had my period, which made me bitchy and unable to do such sweet things and secondly, that would have been awfully awkward, even more than usual, because of _that _talk with Cana a few days prior.

* * *

_I sat at the bar, drinking a special Mira-Mix which she just gave me and reading one of my favorite books as Cana dropped onto the barrel/bar chair next to me. In surprise, I looked up to her to see that for once the usual drunken red cheeks were missing on the brunette and that she was wearing her special 'dating-top' she had introduced me to a few months ago, to explain the whole thing of dating to me. And she was sprawled out on the barrel and the bar top in a mushy heap of depression. _

"_Cana? What's up?" I asked her. Just a groan came as an answer. I turned around to Mirajane, who was preparing a 'special (alcoholic) Mira-Mix', obviously for Cana. The instant she banged the glass on the top Cana's hand shot out and the tankard was empty. It took two second and the mug was filled again, and one second until it was emptied. I saw that spectacle go on for about five times, then Cana sat up straight, wished over her mouth with the back of her hand and stretched. _

"_Yosh! Thanks Mira, I'm all better now." Mira smiled sweetly at her. _

"_You are welcome." _

"_Cana? What happened?" I asked again. Cana turned around to me and started waving her hand nonchalantly. _

"_Ah, nothing. Just another failed date." I sighed. That much, I already figured. _

"_What did he do?" Asked Mira now. She was polishing the top of the bar in front of Cana and me, just as she always did when she was talking with someone. I distantly wondered why the wood didn't have holes already. _

"_Being him." Cana answered. "He was all the time so serious and when I made a joke to lighten the mood, he didn't even grin! Why can't he at least fake some laughers? And then he wanted to start to talk about why Magnolia was so endangered by the global warming. I didn't understand half the words! And then, when I tried to at least seduce him, I mean come on, at least that!, he ditched me with the excuse that his turtle at home needed to be fed!"_

_Mira and I laughed a bit. "That is pretty bad." Mira concluded. I nodded enthusiastically. That was pretty bad indeed. It sounded more like a date suitable for Levy or me, who liked the calm type of guy, but not for Cana! Well, stop… Levy liked Gajeel who was definitely not the calm type, so maybe just me. _

"_I tell you girls, I will never date again." Cana said while shaking her head depressed. Mirajane and I raised an eyebrow simultaneously. _

"…_Too bad I have a date next week." Cana finished. Mirajane and I laughed. _

"_Why did you even meet him when he's like that?" I asked Cana while sipping on my drink.  
"I mean, he sounds more like my type; calm, collected and intellectual." I said. As I saw the 'Are-you-kidding-me-right-now-you-bitch'-stare on Cana's face saw I quickly added "T-that isn't meant as an insult to you, not at all! It really isn't!" I waved the one free hand in front of my face and sweat-dropped._

_Cana's face lightened and she smiled. "I know, kiddo, don't worry. I'm just not boring enough for such a dry relationship without any sparks flying around. I'm more into the 'true love and always never getting bored and wanting the other partner at any time'. But that isn't meant as an insult." Cana said. Ouch. That hurt. Well, now we were even. _

"_So?" I asked her. _

"_Well…he was hot." Cana said dryly. I thought about it. He was exactly my type, which I already decided AND he was hot. _

"_Can you give me his number?" I asked Cana. She nearly spilled her drink she was sipping on and coughed hardly until she could regain her breath. Then she gave me the most unbelieving stare I ever saw on her face._

"_What?" I asked. _

"_I don't believe this. Lucy Heartfilia of the Fairy Tail guild….asking for a number." She whispered. I groaned. _

"_Come on, it's not that exceptional." I said. "Can I have it now?" _

"_No." Cana and Mirajane answered in chorus. _

"_Why not?" I asked outraged. It really wasn't that unbelievable. It was true that I didn't date that much, but I waited for the perfect guy. _

"_Because…" Cana drawled out "you are already meant for someone else." I gave her a dry look. What was that all about now? _

"_And who would that be?" I asked annoyed. _

"_Natsu." Mirajane answered. I looked at her. I should have awaited that. It was an open secret in Fairy Tail that Mira shipped 'NaLu'-I shuddered at that name- but thank gods, Natsu was too dense to realize that. That would have been a lot more embarrassing._

"_Mira we already went through that. I don't see Natsu as anything but nakama. I mean, come on, he isn't even smart enough do get through his thick head what privacy is. And besides, he doesn't see me as anything as nakama as well." I said. These were the results I came up with after hours of excessive thinking. I really was a little disappointed by the results but I know that I only think that way because the idea of a possible relationship was lodged into my head. I really didn't love Natsu. But I loved love in itself and I really wanted to have someone who cared for me, so I was happy about the fact, that maybe someone liked me, even if it was Natsu. _

_Mira didn't think that way though. _

"_Lucy, what you are saying now is clearly just denial. One day you will realize that you love him, don't worry. And Natsu loves you as well but since he is a boy and just not mature enough to worry about things like love, he doesn't get yet that he's in love with you. But I will help him with that, of course. And Natsu gets the concept of privacy, he just choose to ignore it." Mira smiled at me warmly, making me think of the fairy godmother in the fairytales Mama just to read to me when I was young. _

_Cana banged her first on the bar. The drunken flush was on her cheeks again, so that Mira-Mixes finally got into her system. _

"_I'll help you with making Natsu realize his feelings. I suggest we put Lucy into suspenders and a lacy corset and lock them in a room shut. I mean, that's bound to get us a few little Dragon Slayers in nine months." My jaw dropped at this. _

"_I WOULD NEVER WEAR SOMETHING LIKE THAT!" I screeched and hit Cana with my book. In the background Mirajane got all mushy and started crying "Baby Dragon Slayers…..Pink haired Stellar Spirit mages…..so cute!"_

* * *

So I couldn't just get all lovey-dovey with him (even if I wasn't in the state I was currently in) and that's why I choose another possibility.

"Do I look like I am weak enough to get hurt by a fall onto the mattress? God Natsu, I am a mage! I can fight against guys like Angel and you ask me if I get hurt by YOU?!" I pushed him off me and made my way towards the kitchen, while I tried my best to look like I have tasted something sour.

That wasn't that hard.

"Lucy you know that I didn't mean that you were weak. That isn't true."

"Well, it sure sounded like that!"

"You are no fun today." Natsu pouted.

"Well excuse me!" I turned around to him again, my arms stretched out indicating a mocking bow.  
"But maybe you can understand that I don't like it to get woken by my annoying partner that always barges in my apartment although I told him a thousand times already that he should stay out and now he won't even let me sleep anymore. What did you even came here for?"

Natsu frowned but he didn't move from his place on my bed.

"Well, your annoying partner wanted to know if you maybe were interested in a mission but I think he'll have to over think that again with that mood of yours." I showed mock awe and even got so far as to cover my open mouth with my hand.

"I think that was the most complicated sentence you ever spoke." I saw that Natsu was getting angry.

"Lucy I'm maybe not that smart but that isn't a reason for you to insult me. Forget it, I am going to the guild now. Come again if you are more not-mean." He said and opened the window. Right when he was on the window sill, about to jump, I yelled: "I wasn't interested anyway!"

When he was out of the window I crumpled to the floor. I just meant to be a little mean, so he would forget his worries but that had gotten way out of hand!

I was mildly surprised when I noticed the tears running down my cheeks.

* * *

When it was about four in the afternoon I was in my bed, dying a slowly and painful death of cramps I tried to ignore while reading a book. It was a pitiful attempt at distracting me from the pain and more importantly, the fight with Natsu.

So when Levy-chan suddenly stood in my room, I tried to hide my surprise.

"Levy-chan? What are you doing here?" I took a brief look behind her. "And how did you get in?"

"Lu-chan, don't you feel well?" Levy-chan sat down on my bed, completely ignoring my question. Well, at some time she would have started intruding like the others of Fairy Tail anyway.

"I have a stomachache. But why are you asking?" I asked her. I knew that Levy-chan knew that I was on my period; the sentence 'I have a stomachache' was normally used in that way since forever between us girls.

"Well, for one, you look horrible." Levy-chan said. "Thank you so much" I answered dryly. As if I didn't knew that already. My skin was oily, my hair slack and it has lost its shine. I had bags under my eyes and the pajama I was wearing was wrinkled. My skin was dead pale and I had the shimmer of 'make-it-go-away-or-let-me-die' in my eyes.

"And more importantly, you fought with Natsu." I winced.

"So, the guild members already know it" I murmured.

"Of course. It's rare that a steaming and depressed Fire Dragon Slayer wanders into the guild and takes a job without you. We discussed it and came up with the possibilities that you were either kidnapped and he had to get the ransom or that you fought. I came here to check up that you are still here." She smiled at me shortly.

"What happened?" How should I explain it to her? That I was afraid of doing something awkward and decided to be bitchy? That didn't sound that good without the context onto it.

"PMS happened. Things got out of hand." Levy-chan looked at me, blinking astonished.

"That's it?"

"It was bad enough!" I snapped at her. Levy-chan raised her eyebrows and looked at me warningly.  
"Gomenasai." I murmured.

"I said something really mean." I tried to explain.

"May I ask what?"

"I maybe told him that he is stupid." I whispered. Levy-chan sucked in her breath.

"Well, that is pretty bad. But, I think Natsu knows that you don't mean it for real. You are always joking about it."

"Yeah, but maybe it really hurts him! Jokes on the cost of yourself by someone else do hurt. Maybe you can also laugh about them but they hurt none the less. And one day, you begin to believe in them." Levy-chan looked at me like she was about to cry.

"Lu-chan? Don't worry about it. It probably did hurt Natsu, but you know him. He loves you! He won't be angry that long and once he got this dark guild beaten to a pulp, he will have released enough steam to realize that you just had a bad day and that you didn't mean it." My heart soothes at this. Until I realized what exactly Levy-chan had said.

"DARK GUILD?!" I screeched. Levy-chan sweat-dropped.

"I think I said too much…" I grabbed her collar and clung to her in panic. Natsu couldn't be that stupid! He was strong but a dark guild? Alone? Happy was off onto a mission with Carla and Wendy. With Erza and Gray it would be okay but it seems like he was on his own and he was far too reckless and would rush in without a plan so anyone could easily ambush him and overpower him! _I _could defeat him with that reckless mind of his!

"He's alone, right?" I asked breathless.

"Yeah…"

"What is that guild called?"

"Well, Mira said, they were called 'Sensen Rose'.

My heart stopped for a moment and started beating on a far faster speed again. I had heard of that guild. The Weekly Sorcerer had reported of their crimes, the guild master was a guy called Slicer and normally they attacked with cheap traps and from behind. They used scythes, battle combos of blade and handle. Still, they mostly used cheap tricks to get the mages to power out or be restrained so they have an easy win. At least he had his heightened senses so he couldn't wander straight into an ambush….I think. Still, they were dangerous and when he was angry, he was fighting the best, but also reckless and with those guys you had to have strategy.

"I gotta go after him. Where is the mission headed?" I asked Levy-chan while I sprang up and unbuttoned my pajama. I changed as fast as I could into a long-sleeved shirt and my usual skirt and set on my belt with the whip and the keys while Levy-chan gave me the details on the mission. It seemed that the major of a town called Rosardion had send the request because people in his town had seen members of Sensen Rose and one guy was kidnapped. Rosardion was within walking distance to Magnolia so I could be there fast if I got a vehicle.

"Levy-chan, would you go to the guild and ask Gray and Erza to come after me? I think we might need backup." "Hai." And with that I was out, running through town in search of a vehicle. The carts of the merchants weren't fast enough and I barely remembered hearing a horse in the morning. I shoved my way through the crowd in search of one and thought two times that I had seen one, but one time, it was a mule and the other time it was a costume similar to the one of Sagittarius. Finally I found one at the shop of an older merchant who was trying to sell his apples. As he saw me coming he friendly smiled at me.

"Good day, young lady. Would you like to try my delicious apples? They are the best within fifty miles!" I registered somewhere in my mind that this guy was the one that had held me awake this morning. For such an age, he sure got a powerful lung.

"No thanks, actually, I was thinking, could I borrow that horse? Thank you so much!" I rushed out while I was already unbinding the reins from the pole they were bound to.

"Eh.." the man stuttered astonished but I was already up on the horse and cracked the reins.

"Heya!" I screamed and pressed my heels in the horse's flanks. It neighed and went straight into a steady gallop, something not all horses could do. He-I could see that it was a stallion- set his feet steadily and made his way through the crowds on the market, many people fled screaming to clear our path, fortunately. Once we were off the market I led the horse to the street which would get us to Rosardion, and the stallion picked up speed once he had an empty street.

Half an hour later-I begged it wasn't too much time lost- I stood in front of the town hall and raced up the stairs after I dropped off the horse. The horse didn't move, but started to drink from a nearby water ton, but I didn't care. I was just happy that the stallion was such an extraordinary good animal and that I took riding lessons when I was a child under the care of the Heartfilia reputation. Otherwise I would have surely fallen off with such a ridiculous speed and on the bare back of a horse.

I busted through the doors and the miss in the front hall sweat-dropped at my sight.

"Hello, how can I help you?" I flashed my Fairy Tail insignia and answered briefly "It's an emergency, I have to speak with the major." The miss eyed me suspiciously. "Gomenasai, but the major is unavailable right now." I gave the lady my best Lucy glare that could not only make Gray and Natsu stop fighting but could anyone make peeing their pants. "I don't fucking much care if he is in a meeting or on the toilet. I. WILL. SPEAK. TO. HIM. NOW." I growled. The secretary squeaked and pointed to the next door on the right.

I hurried over there and went through the door without knocking. It was a big room, resembling my father's study, just without all the books. One long carpet went toward a big desk in front of a window front. Behind the desk a little man with a beer belly and grey hair sat, rubbing his forehead with great worry. As he heard my footsteps he looked up and frowned.

"I told Marianna that I wasn't to be disturbed." I ignored him and strode towards him. Once again I flashed my mark.

"I am from Fairy Tail. My partner took the mission about Sensen Rose and I would like to know where you sent him off to."

"How can I know that you aren't lying?" I vein popped on my forehead and I slammed my hands onto the desk going nose to nose with the major.

"I know that Natsu will rush in there without thinking and that Sensen Rose will most likely ambush him so TELL ME ALREADY!" I screamed into his face. The major paled.

"In the forest on the east is an abandoned hunting lodge. You will most likely find them there, just follow the river." "Arigatou" I said, turned and hurried out of the building again. The stallion was still drinking and I didn't want to overwork him so I more or less stole a magical motorcycle that stood in front of the town hall for whatever reason. Then I took off as fast as I could, begging that it wouldn't draw too much magic so I could still be from use when I arrived.

I soon found the river and raced along the edge. Within about ten minutes I could make out the lodge so I braked and let the cycle stay there so the motor lacrima wouldn't reveal me. I took off running and stayed as close to the river as I could so I had a safe view onto the undergrowth in which possible mages could hide. Soon however I found myself hiding in the undergrowth as I could make out voices. I crawled further towards the hunting lodge, which was actually quite beautiful with the frescoes and the stucco showing various hunting scenes and animals on the walls, which already began to crumble and the clearing around it.

As I spotted the pink hair I breathed out in relief. I finally found him. The next second I paled although. Natsu was hanging from a rope that was wrapped around him and fastened to a strong branch of one of the trees which were close to the clearing. He was rocking back and forth and he was green in his face; the motion sickness had set in. That meant he was rendered unable to fight. Around him twelve guys had gathered. From the statue I could say that all, except for one, were men. They wore leotard-like, sleeve-less coveralls and a ragged cape was fastened to it. They were all mages, I knew that much, but everyone had still the scythe which they fought mostly with.

I calculated the situation. First I had to free Natsu; I couldn't defeat all of them alone. I pulled out Cancer's key and summoned him silently.

"Hello, Lucy. You haven't summoned me for a long time-ebi." He greeted me.

"Cancer, I need you to climb up that tree, get on the branch and cut that rope Natsu is fastened with on my signal, do you think you can do that?" I whispered to him.

He nodded. "Anything for Lucy-ebi." He made his way soundless through the bushes. I pondered my next move. It would be nice if I could somehow distract them so they wouldn't see Natsu dropping to the ground and on the same time I could use that distraction then to get at least one of these bastards out of the game unnoticed by the others, thanks to the distraction.

I pulled out Gemini. As Gemi and Mini appeared I held my hand in front of their mouths so they couldn't loudly announce their entrance.

"Gemi, I need you to transform in any cute girl you know, except for me, and then go there!" I pointed to the right side of the castle. We were currently on the left side so they would have their backs faced to us. "Distract the mages as good and as long as you can, I don't know how, figure something out." Gemi nodded under my hand and turned with a slight WOW in the background into a busty brunette with clothes that even I would find inappropriate for the public.

Then he disappeared into the bushes. I turned to face Mini. "Mini, please turn into anything you want, just be sure that you can overpower and muffle that guy." I pointed to the guy standing the nearest to us. "We will sneak up on them when Gemi is distracting them, then we'll drag them in these bushes and tie them up." Lately, Gemi and Mini had been improving a lot so they could turn into two different persons now. Mini whispered something in my hand so I let go and asked him to repeat that please.

"Can I propose something?" he said. I looked at him questionably. The next second he heard disappeared into the Spirit Realm and turned up once again. He held two handkerchiefs in his hands.

"Chloroform." He explained. "Hold that about five seconds onto his nose and he will go to sleep."

I smiled at him. "That is a very good idea!"

Mini turned into Taurus and we waited for Gemi to make his appearance.

Soon, the bushes on the other side began to rustle and Gemi revealed herself. Just as I planned, the villains turned to look at the brunette who suddenly appeared, and I searched Cancers eyes. He was, just like I said on the branch and was staring at me, waiting for my signal.

I nodded and turned an arm with a scissors around the branch to cut the rope with it. I faced Mini and nodded another time; then we began to silently crawl out of the bushes. We went up at the same time and pressed the handkerchief with the chloroform onto the nose and the mouth of two guys who were the nearest to us. They began to struggle but we could restrain them and the handkerchief muffled their screams. Soon their movements began to slow and they sunk to the ground while we still had the handkerchief over their noses and mouths. When they were finally unmoving we dragged the limp bodies into the bushes. I looked behind us to see Natsu in a heap on the ground, clearly just recovering from the motion sickness. He pushed his torso up and looked at me, I signaled with my head to follow us.

He looked briefly to the dark mages; then he rushed into the bushes we had disappeared into a few seconds before. He crouched next to me as I was thanking Cancer for his help and sending him home.

Then I began tying the guys up, along with Mini, Gemi was still distracting the guys with a long explanation of how she was lost. I was hyper-aware of Natsu next to me and I wondered if he was still angry. He didn't say anything which was a bad sign. When I was finished tying up my guy I looked at Natsu from the corner of my eye and to my shock, I saw many fine cuts that were bleeding very hard though.

"Shit, you are hurt!" I exclaimed and without thinking about our current fight I turned around and grabbed his arm to expect the cuts further.

"Damn them; ambushing like little cowardly freaks" I murmured. That wasn't a nice way to fight and ambushing was just unfair and in my view, they were stripped of any pride and honor they would have before by ambushing.

I was startled as Natsu pulled his arm out of my grasp. I looked up to him to see that he was distanced, so he still was angry with me. I gulped.

"It's nothing." He said. I rolled my eyes. "Natsu, that isn't nothing! You would also say when your head was ripped out that it's nothing and ambushing is just without any honor." He looked at me coldly.

"You are doing the exact same ambushing right now." He said while I got angry. I was here to help him and I was insulted for it.

"Maybe you are right but I am not using the defenseless state of someone to hurt them. I just tied them up!" I waved my hand to the both tied up mages where Mini was still waiting for new commands.

"And I don't care if I am a bad person now that I am ambushing bad guys but as long as I am doing it not for the fun of it but for helping a friend, I can't sink as low as these guys." Before Natsu could respond I turned to face Mini.

"Mini you and Gemi can go back now. Thank you very much and please thank Gemi on my behalf as well." I smiled sweetly as Mini began to glow and disappeared into the Spirit Realm. I turned to look at the clearing where the villains were startled about the strange girl disappearing into thin air.

"Hey where did she go?" "What happened?" "Slicer-sama, Crusher and Mörder aren't here anymore!" I saw how the one guy I had identified as a girl turned around at looked for her two disappeared mages. I whispered to Natsu "I don't know what you will do, but I on my behalf will fight these assholes." Then I went out of the bushes and the girl spotted me in an instant. She narrowed her eyes and took a fighting pose. I heard the bushes behind me rustle and the girl's eyes were widening and then hushing towards the cut-through rope. Then she faced me again, narrowing her eyes even more than before.

"You" she breathed. The other guild mages were all tuning around as well now.

"Slicer of Sensen Garden, we came to put you into jail for all the crimes you committed." I said.

The girl started to grin creepily. "We will see about that. Coupable, Formation Thorn of deathly Afterlife." While I tried to figure out what that meant, a battle pose, maybe?, a guy in the behind nodded and started chanting in a name Levy-chan maybe knew, but we sure as hell didn't.

I stood into battle pose, and I didn't know what to expect. All of a sudden rose bushes shot out of the ground into the sky. They grew into four walls of many quadrates, building two rows next to each other. They separated me from Natsu and they were so thorough that you surely couldn't just go through; you would be torn to little shreds.

"Natsu!" I shouted, hoping that they wouldn't have used that chance to ambush Natsu again.

"I'm here" he said and I could hear from the voice that he was preparing to battle. I turned around in my own quadrate to see a guy standing in front of the wall leading to the next quadrate.

"This is our formation for partners." Slicer's voice from somewhere else said. "You will have to battle separated and only when you defeat your opponent you will be able to go through the next wall." I rolled my eyes. So it was like a battle-yourself-up-to-the-boss kind of formation. I eyed the guy warily. He didn't look to strong because he was kind of lanky and had near to none muscles, but still, he could probably wield that crazy looking scythe he held.

When he noticed me staring at him he gave me smile and saluted.

"Meatball's the name. I hope you won't throw a fuss and let me defeat you easily." "As if!" I spat.

Meatball (that name didn't fit at all why was such a scrawny guy called 'Meatball'?") sighed disappointed and looked at me pitying. "Well then, I won't hesitate to unleash my whole power on you…" I prepared myself and readied to summon Taurus. I figured he would be the best with his pure brute strength against a scythe. Before I could fish out the key, I was distracted by the guy though.

Suddenly he pumped his fist and throw his other arm high in the air while he sank to one knee, reminding me somehow of Jason the journalist.

"My beautiful baby gems I call yoooouuuuuu!" he shouted. I fell into battle pose, expecting something to appear besides him or behind me, but nothing happened. The guy remained in his pose though and after about three minutes nothing happening he started to sweat and chanted quietly "I call you, I call you, I call you" expecting me to not notice.

I sweat-dropped at his antics. What did he even call? He only called them my beautiful baby gems and if someone would call me like that I wouldn't appear either, to admit it. Meatball, obviously in panic now, started to sweat even more and he trembled all over. I shook my head.

"I'm seriously not in the mood for this." I hissed because as the anticipation sank, I could feel the reason this whole thing started with again. My stomach cramped and I was pissed. Natsu was probably already three quarters in front of me if his opponents were as weak as this one.

I pulled out Taurus' key and was about to summon him when suddenly I noticed the earth was quaking. The next second, holes exploded in the forest ground and thousands of bugs were flowing out.

"KYAAAAAAAHHHHH!" I screamed and jumped away from the holes as far as possible. From all of the things he could have summoned, it needed to be _bugs?_ I was a girl goddamnit, my current situation proved this and girls couldn't deal with bugs. As I was still holding on the key and Taurus was able to come to me that way and he undoubtingly must have heard that cry, he appeared and I was cowering on his back the next second clinging onto his neck like for dear life.

"Make them go away!" I screeched as the floor, where I stood before, now crowded with bugs as well. Taurus squished a bug that crawled up his legs. Normally he would have probably whooped about the fact that he could play hero to the damsel in distress (me) but regarding that he was ankle-high in bugs and cows just genetically didn't like bugs and that Meatball was cackling like a villain probably mitigated that joy.

"Lucy-sama, I wooooon't be able to defeat the bugs when you are sitting on mooo." I shivered at the thought of stepping back into _that_ down there.

"You have to defeat the guy over there!" I pointed at Meatball who was now seemingly _cuddling _with a few insects on his hand. I shuddered and Taurus beneath me seemed to shiver as well.

"I will handle this….moooootant for my precious booooobs of Lucy-sama!" he cried and let me fall unceremoniously on the ground, butt first. Bugs were falling around and landing also on me and I heard multiple cracks under me. I paled and stood up slowly, the bugs falling off or being brushed off by me subconsciously as I looked to where I sat in horror. There, although new bugs were already crawling over them again, lay the smashed remains of about two dozen bugs.

I. Crushed. The bugs. With my ASS!

"KYAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!EWEWEWEWEW!" I screamed while shuddering from disgust.

I was interrupted by the clash of metal to metal and looked around to see Taurus and Meatball lashing their weapons and lashing out to each other. Meatball had the disadvantage that his scythe was bulky, although fast, so he was hindered in his moving capacities. But Taurus' ax was heavy which slowed him down a good bit, and because of his size, he was a good target and not as agile as Meatball. So Taurus needed backup, otherwise he wouldn't be able to keep up with the speed off the scythe.

I sashayed my way over there, trying to ignore the bugs swirling around my feet and loosened my whip. Nothing was as fast as a whip and with nothing you could be as agile as with a whip.

I lashed it out and the end hooked around the leg of Meatball. He stared down in surprise and then he looked at me, obviously surprised that I was fighting. I snarled. Why was always everyone assuming that I was too weak to fight along with my spirits? I pulled and Meatball struggled to keep his balance on one foot. He didn't notice the attack from Taurus coming and when he finally did, he could only block sloppily. His scrawny body on one foot didn't even have the slightest chance against the brute strength of Taurus so he fell over easily.

Taurus raised his ax, preparing to give him the rest, but Meatball waved his hands in front of his face and begged for mercy.

"Please, please, I give up! I know how to open the wall, just please don't kill me!" he whined.

"Taurus, wait!" I said. "We don't have to knock him out when he is giving up." "But Lucy-sama" Taurus complained. I could understand him, he was anxious about the possibility of him attacking from behind once we didn't see him anymore, but I took pity with the boy. He didn't seem to me like a villain at all, not even the cackling before sounded like a real villain cackling, more like a trained evil laugh of a pathetic wanna-be bad guy.

"Look at him, he is just a boy! I think he isn't that evil at all. I mean, come on, he was cuddling-shudder- with those bugs!" I reasoned.

"They aren't _bugs_! They are the beautiful Anoplotrupes stercorosus, or as you people degradingly say, dung beetles." Meatball hissed.

"Dung…beetles…." My eye started twitching. "I sat…on…dung beetles…." The shudders of disgust came back tenfold.

"YOU DID WHAT?!" Meatball screamed. I looked at him to see absolute loathing in his eyes.

"How…dare…you…" he shook with restrained fury while I sweat-dropped. Were they so precious to him? "How dare you kill my baby gems with your fat ass!" he shouted.

"MY WHAT?"I screamed back. "Taurus! Kill him!"

"But Lucy-sama you said.."

"I don't care! KILL HIM!" Taurus huffed and turned his ax around, so the blade was on the up. Then he dropped the handle of the ax right between the eyes of the boy still lying on the ground. Said eyes widened and Meatball gasped a last time, then he remained motionless, knocked out cold.

"Fair enough" I huffed while my arms were crossed. Taurus gave me a deadpan look before he turned to look at the wall of rose bushes that now seemed to open like a curtain. I could make out another person and I gave Taurus a reassuring last look before we strode through the wall that fell back behind us in place. One down, four to go.

* * *

The next one was even easier than Meatball, although I guessed that was because of my 'humongous rack' as he said. He simply crawled over to me, let his guard down and groped me. Next thing he knew, he was nearly sliced in half by Taurus who exclaimed that 'Loooooocy-sama's boooobs were only to be touched by him' and then he was Lucy-kicked into afterlife. The same would have nearly happened with Taurus if Loke wouldn't have shown up and exclaimed that he would take over now, since Taurus wasn't even fast enough to stop filthy bastards from groping me.

The curtains had opened and when we went through we were attacked from above, luckily Loke noticed and threw aside before sending a Regulus: Impact to the enemy. The guy dodged, although narrowly, and I could make out wings on him. They had feathers, but not the form of a bird's wings, more like a bat's one. In short, they were scary.

We tried almost everything to shoot him down but he was at huge advantage because of his wings and every once in a while he would come down to lash on us with his scythe. We dodged of course, but one time my arm was sliced which Loke missed fortunately. I didn't want him to worry about me while concentrating on the fight.

I then had an idea and sneaked a hand in my pouch for the key of Sagittarius; then I waited until the bird/man thing would come down on us again. Loke stole a glance to me, probably wondering why I didn't attack anymore but he didn't lose a word and tried further to land a hit on the dark mage. When he came down, I summoned Sagittarius, who shot the bird instantly, since he was near enough and had too much speed to stop. The spear exploded and the mage was defeated, but the limp body still was on his route to me and knocked into me, scythe first. I could narrowly get all of my important parts on the body get out of reach of the blade, although I was cut at the collarbone.

"Lucy!" Loke cried out and ran towards me, Sagittarius was already on my side. "Are you hurt?-moshi, moshi" he asked and I reassured both of them that I was fine. We got the heavy mage off me and I sent Sagittarius back, then Loke and I went through the next wall. The rose bushes had just fallen down behind us back in place when I heard a familiar roar of pain.

"Natsu!" I cried out and rushed towards the wall were the sound came from, trying to sneak a peek through the bushes. I cut my hands on the thorns but I couldn't see anything. I turned around towards the mage in this quarter. He was a muscular guy with tattoos all over his arms and face and he was obviously bored as he was slumping on his scythe and fishing something out of his teeth.

I gave him the best Lucy glare I could muster up. "What happened to him?" I demanded to know.

"How should I know?" he answered without even looking at me but staring at something he had picked out of his teeth and then snipping it away. I snarled in disgust and anger. He straightened a bit and finally looked at me although he still looked bored.

"I don't see anything but these four walls" he gestured around him "while I am inside here. And dear God, that's so boooring." he whined. "I waited all the time for someone to battle to finally come and when someone comes, it's a little hooker" I glared even harder "and a weird kitty-boy" Loke next to me growled. The guy yawned. "I was hoping for that kiddo on the other side, although he seems to be pathetic as well. Well let's make the best out of this. I'm Bowel." I raised an eyebrow.

"Your names are always getting better." I sneeringly said, trying to at least get the littlest reaction out of this guy. His aloof attitude was annoying the crap out of me. Bowel grinned. "I'm named after the bowels, the innards; because I use to slice my victims open and eat their bowels." He explained while I paled. Loke shoved me behind him protectively while the scene of Bowel picking in his teeth and snipping something in the dirt replayed in my mind. I gulped.

"Well then, Itadakimasu!" Bowel shouted and crouched. Then he jumped inhumanly high and raised his scythe similar to a sword to impale us from above. Loke and I dove away and a millisecond later a scythe split the ground where we had been standing. I sprinted away to create a distance between us just to get blocked by Bowel standing right in front of me.

I screeched to a halt and dropped on the ground, the scythe slicing the air just where I was before. I tried to crawl away as fast as possible but Bowel grabbed a hold on my hair and yanked me up. Through my yowls of pain I could hear Loke screaming for me.

A blade was pressed up to my neck and I whimpered in fear as Bowel growled in my air. I could see Loke in front of me, struggling because he obviously couldn't attack while I was in the grasp of Bowel but he couldn't let Bowel slice me as well. I gave him a reassuring smile, although it must have looked strained. Bowel whispered in my ear.

"It doesn't make sense escaping from me. My magic is Speed. I am faster than sound and light and with eating the innards of my victims I become even stronger." I could feel how he smiled against my cheek. "And I have eaten many person's guts" I gulped and let out another strained breath, not quite a whimper. I didn't want him to get that triumph as well.

"I wonder how, with that tactic you have" I whispered and watched how he frowned in confusion before he doubled over in pain. I had simply knocked my foot up into his crotch for which he had given me the perfect position and held the scythe away from any of my body parts with my hands he had so stupidly not restrained. The only hold he had had on me was on my hair and with the scythe at my neck; he must have assumed that I would be paralyzed with fear.

Once I maybe would have been but I was a mage now, a Fairy Tail mage and I had fought many battles with much more frightening enemies before. I rushed over to Loke who embraced me relieved when we heard two howls of pain from voices I didn't know though I could make out the voice of Slicer, the girl, under them. I frowned. So Natsu must have encountered her, and since she was the master of this guild she was most likely 'the boss' but why two howls? Natsu only had one opponent at a time!

Before I could think about this further though, a searing pain went down from between my shoulder blades towards my hip. I screamed and crumbled against Loke, who held me as good as possible and tried to back away. I turned my head to see Bowel standing there, still wearing a pained look on his face and cradling a blood-smudged scythe in his hands. Smudged with _my_ blood.

I stood up as good as I could and backed away as well.

"Thinking you can just play foully like that, ne?" he sneered and somehow this whole thing really, really reminded me of Jose. "Well, I won't give up!" he screeched and charged at me. I knew that I couldn't dodge, not with such a wound and with his magic being speed-related.

The last millisecond I used to close my eyes and a thought flew through my head, how pitiful it was to die now here and get my innards eaten when I had already fought with Hades. Well, but I was always with my team so it seemed as if I really was weak alone.

As nothing happened I opened my eyes in confusion to see the figure of Loke standing in front of me. I was shock frozen. His body crumpled to the ground and I could see Bowel standing in front of us, his scythe still raised and adorned with flesh blood.

Finally I could move again and I scrambled to Loke's side.

"Loke! Loke! Answer me! Please answer me!" I turned him around to see his sliced chest dunked in blood. He gave me a forced, reassuring smile, before he vanished into the Spirit Realm.

I sat there shocked, taking in what just had happened. Loke had thrown himself in front of me. How he could have been that fast I didn't know, but he managed and Bowel sliced him. Now he disappeared into the Spirit Realm. I desperately hoped that Celestial Spirits couldn't die and that the others would treat him.

"What the hell? He disappeared!" Bowel behind me exclaimed. I turned around in a flash and this time, before _he _could react my foot was engraved in his face. Bowel stumbled back and I couldn't help but stupidly stand out in the open in front of him, screaming in his face. If anyone of my friends saw that they would have me killed.

"THAT'S BECAUSE HE IS A CELESTIAL SPIRIT YOU BASTARD!" Bowel actually looked taken aback. "A what?" he stupidly asked. My feet was implanted in his face again, although this time, he grabbed my ankle and pulled me up on it, throwing me in the wall. Thorns dug in my back and my wound, but I was too livid to care.

"_Survey the heavens, open the heavens…_" I started to murmur as I fell onto the ground. Bowel was back there in a millisecond, slicing at me, which I could dodge so only my side was sliced.

"_All the stars, far and wide…"_ A good chunk of my hair was cut off as I jerked back from another attack.

"_Show me thy appearance…with such shine."_ I could only block with my arm and bit back a cry as blood flowed out.

"_Oh Tetrabiblos…I am the ruler of the stars…"_ My cheek was cut as I dropped onto the ground so I could dodge another assault.

"What are you blabbering?" Bowel yowled and hacked after me which I rolled away from.

"And what the fuck is happening here?" he continued as he saw the planets surrounding him. It was getting harder to concentrate on Urano Metria with Bowel complaining the whole time.

"_Aspect become complete….Open thy malevolent gate."_I stood up as Bowel was still trying to analyze the change on the nature around him. Finally he looked at me again. He drew back and sweat-dropped.

"What's up with your eyes…." I snarled at him and he glared, preparing to strike again. I closed my eyes and concentrated.

"Oh _88 stars of the heaven…. __**Shine! Urano Metria!**_" I yelled, just as the scythe slid through the skin at my neck. The planets exploded and as I finally could see something again, Bowel's crumbled figure lied at the ground. I walked up to him. The only slight cut on my neck stung a little but I was proud of it. I had been faster than him.

"That's what you get when messing with my Celestial Spirits while I'm on my monthly gift." I snarled. Then I turned around go through the next wall, scared about facing another opponent after already having to use Urano Metria on this one, running out on magic and with Loke hurt. When I went through, there wasn't a quarter though and I was standing on the clearing again, in front of me Slicer and Coupable on the ground, unconscious and Erza and Gray standing over them, along with Natsu, who seemed to have a wound on his leg, already wrapped and taken care of, but seemed fine for the rest.

So that was why there were two yowls. Erza and Gray must have come how I asked Levy to plead them and then they must have defeated Slicer and Coupable at once, who were together 'the boss'.

Gray must have spotted me because his eyes widened to dinner plates. Erza noticed that and looked for what he was looking at and her eyes widened as well, but they soon resumed to a look of pure fury on her face.

I guessed I looked pretty bad.

"WHO DID THAT?" she yelled. I sweat-dropped as she requipped into her Heaven Wheels armor. The I smiled and waved my hands soothingly.

"Erza, it's okay, they are all taken care of."

"I DON'T CARE I WANT THAT BASTARD'S HEAD HANGING ON MY WALL!" Another sweat-drop joined the one already at my forehead.

"Does it look that bad?" I asked, still trying to soothe her. Gray, instead of replying (although the grim look on his face was kinda a reply too), made a mirror out of ice. It wasn't as good as areal mirror would be, but I think, I got what they meant when I saw my reflection.

"Dear Mavis" slipped out. It wasn't only the multiple cuts on my body (although shallow, except for the one on my arm) but more like the whole thing, my hair was messed up as hell, chunks of it standing off and in the front a whole part missing, the bruises on my arms from the constant dropping and stuff and dirt all over me. My clothes were torn too. And probably the worst was the expression on my face, tear streaks on my cheeks and a whole lot of fury still there, because of Loke. I had to check up on him as soon as I could but I wouldn't do it now otherwise Erza would worry even more.

"Maaaaan, there goes another outfit. And how long will it take this "I held up the leftovers of the cut off bang "to grow back in place?" I whined and Erza relaxed a bit. Gray even grinned at my whining, since they knew that I wouldn't whine if it was that bad.

I noticed that Natsu hadn't said anything the whole time, and I didn't dare to look at him, afraid that he might be not affected; after all we were still in this stupid fight. So I turned to Erza.

"Hey let's get back, I want to get this finished before anyone wakes up again." Erza nodded shortly and gave me handcuffs for the mages that appeared suddenly out of nowhere. As I turned around I saw that the rose bushes had crawled back to the earth and I could freely see all the mages. On Natsu's side there were mostly charred lumps remaining.

"Hey Lucy?" Gray asked suddenly. I turned around to him again.  
"What is it?"  
"What's that on your, eh…..behind?" he asked with a really weird face. My blood ran cold.  
"EWEWEWEWEWWEWEWEEWEWEW!" I cried. "Why did you remind me?"  
"I actually don't want an answer anymore."

* * *

We had handcuffed all the mages (after searching a while for the one I had Lucy-kicked away) and I had learned that they really had ambushed Natsu while he was searching for them as Erza asked Natsu to tell his story.

When he came to the part where I helped him it started to become embarrassing for him, but Erza harassed him to tell further and after he had told, she actually Good-Job-ed me. I tried to explain that I actually didn't do that much and that I played rather dirty but Erza shut me up with a discarding wave of her hand. When Natsu was telling how he fought the mages on his half I would have almost slapped me as he told that the howl of pain hasn't been his one but the one of the mage, who could transform into him and tried to control his thoughts that way. Too bad Natsu could fight without thinking.

"Lucy, what about you? What guys did you defeat?" Gray asked, as we came to the cycle and I picked it up first.

"And is that your cycle?" he continued.

"Actually, no. I borrowed it."  
"Maybe you should start from the beginning." Erza suggested. I sighed. I wasn't proud about most of my actions, as scaring the major or stealing the cycle.

"Well, you see, Levy-chan told me that Natsu went out to execute these guys" I gestured at the mages that were unconscious on the cart Erza always took along to missions "and I read about them and that they are fighting unfair so I worried and um, I borrowed a horse from the market-"

"Y'mean you stole it." Gray interrupted and I glared at him before continuing.

"And with that borrowed horse I rode here, where I asked the secretary and the major in the city hall kindly about Natsu-"

"So you scared them." Gray again.

"I asked them about Natsu and then I borrowed this cycle-"

"Stole it." "Gray shut up already!"

"And I drove with it until I saw them and helped Natsu out." I finished. Gray was holding back guffaws and Erza smiled mildly.

"What about the guys you fought?" she wanted to know again.

"Uh, well, the first one was actually kinda nice but-shudder- he was a _bug _summoner and you know me, I absolutely hate bugs, or in this case as he so kindly corrected me, dung beetles, and- don't look at me like that Gray!- then he insulted me so I told Taurus to, eh, restrain him and he just knocked him out like that-"

"So you told him to kill the boy and Taurus only knocked him out." "How are you doing that!" "It's a gift." "Shut up and let me continue."

"And well we moved on to the next one who was a pervert and touched me inappropriately for which he was nearly sliced and then Lucy-kicked." Everyone sweat-dropped at this, looking at the guy who we had found on the other side of the hunting lodge.

"Loke traded with Taurus and then there was this bird guy flying around but we could get him and then there was the last guy." Everyone looked at me expectantly and after a while in which I didn't say anything Erza threatened to make me impotent if I wouldn't explain. While with my current cramps I was tempted to take that offer, I still wanted kids later, like I said, Yumi Layla and Haru Michael. Or something else.

"Well, he is a speed mage and long story short, it was pretty impossible for us to fight, he hurt Loki and I used Urano Metria to knock him out." I tried to make it as harmless as possible.

"What was his name?" Erza said, seemingly buying it.

"Bowel." Erza stopped dead-tracks.

"What a name is that?"

"Well, um" If I would now tell them why he was named that way they would freak out because they would realize what a freak he was. Idea, idea, idea, come on, come to me!

"He has very flexible innards and that way he is not only really fast but also agile!" I shot out. Erza stared at me weirdly. I knew it. No one would have bought that, it was just so bad. Even a toddler would have looked through that.

"I see." She answered, great now what should I tell the- Wait what? She did buy that? I looked at her to see her calm although she still looked skeptic.

Luckily for me, I saw the perfect distraction.

"Hey, look! There's the town hall!" I yelled and run up to it. I smiled as I saw that the stallion was still waiting on the opposite side of the street, just wandering a few meters before turning around again. I wandered up to it and rubbed him on the nose.

"You are such a wonderful horse, why has that merchant got you, huh? You could be one of the best out there and yet you are only pulling carts with apple in it." I talked with him. Maybe I should try to buy the horse from the merchant; then I could find a better place for him. For example in the stables of one of the top-notch families I hate so much due to my childhood or better said, the phase between the death of my mum and my run to Fairy Tail.

These families treated people like shit, but to say the truth, they cared about their houses and their horses. Showing off richness and that stuff.

Erza, Gray and Natsu came up from behind me.

"Hey Lucy, are you seriously talking with that horse?" Gray asked. I sighed. Normally all these questions about my weirdness and the interruptions in the story would have been asked by Natsu but since he still seemed to refuse to talk with me and Gray must have sensed that, he is trying to make up for that _twice_.

"Scientists have found out that speaking to an animal is improving the bond between the human and the animal." I said matter-of-factly. "Besides, you should have seen him, he's such a beauty of a horse, he ran all the way here without once slowing down, not many horses can do that, and his gait is so wonderful, I could ride in full-blown gallop without saddle and I didn't fall off once!" As if sensing that I was complimenting him, he cradled his snout in the base of my neck.

"Uh…" Gray said behind me. Of course he wouldn't be able to understand my love with horses; I bet he never sat on one of them.

"Anyways, we have to get the reward for Natsu." I said and broke loose from the stallion. We went up the stairs towards the secretary. She still looked rather pissed and eyed us, beaten up and Natsu and me bloody, and I did my best to hide behind the others, because for one, she didn't need to see me again (I was quite ashamed about the stunt I pulled now) and for two, she didn't need to see my attire, because from all of us, I looked definitely the worst.

"Hello, we would like to meet the major." Erza said, politely as ever. The secretary looked her up and down.

"You are one of the guys who asked me nicely today to see the major, before, right?" she asked and I sweat-dropped.

"Yes, I did, when I remember right."

"Good. Well, I'm sorry Miss, but the major is currently in a meeting. Very important stuff, it seems, the men talking with him are all soldiers." She informed us while I wondered if she was allowed to say who the major was meeting, especially if it was that important.

"We'll wait then." Erza said and turned around to make her way over to a couch for the waiting ones. With that she revealed me though. The woman's eyes narrowed and she gave me one of the scariest glares I have ever seen.

"You." She spat while I smiled warily at her.

"You are the one who did NOT ask me nicely today, not at all! Do you even know who I am girly? I am so over your class! I am the secretary of the major of Rosardion and I can get you kicked out of the country if I want! And you dare talking to me like that and then you have the nerve to steal my cycle too!" I doubted that her power would go as far as that, but I still wanted to be polite, since it really wasn't okay what I did.

"I'm very sorry, I was just so worried about my team partner here" I motioned to where Natsu stood, only to see him and Gray gone. Then I heard muffled laughters from over the couch where Erza sat and saw Natsu and Gray there, silently guffawing. They had sneaked their way over there, such traitors, to leave me with this woman alone! "There" I corrected "and I didn't really mean to steal your bike, I was just in such a hurry and couldn't think clearly and that's why."

I gave the woman my puppy eyes but that wasn't even necessary anymore.

"Aw, you were worried over your boyfriend, right? That is so cute, I am so touched! I forgive you, something like that can happen to anyone right? And you just had your little boyfriend in your mind. Kawaii~ Go on over to your team and your boyfriend!"

"But…he isn't my boyfriend…" I said feeling the heat on my cheeks but I was already shoved towards the others by the surprisingly strong secretary.

I walked over to them and let myself drop on the couch. Gray and Natsu were still laughing like crazy and I was happy that Natsu was even a little bit more like himself again.

"What's with everyone thinking you two are a couple?" Gray forced out between laughers causing me to blush even harder.

"As if Lucy would ever go out with Flamehead!" he giggled. Natsu became serious at once.

"You wanna go at it?" he growled and pushed his forehead to Gray's how they were always doing. I sighed. If they were to destroy the lobby, Natsu's reward would vanish into thin air. Well, more like vanish into the rebuilding of the lobby. Fortunately Erza put them in place and not long after, the door to the room of the major opened, revealing Knights over Knights over Knights. I could almost feel how Natsu's mood went south. In front of all the knights stood the major, who held the door open and a Knight who was obviously the leader of the division.

"So you are saying, they are staying near an old hunting lodge and those four wizards all went after them?" The major nodded and the leader sighed in pity.

"They won't be alive anymore." Wow. I feel so much faith in me. I think we four all gave the leader a pretty good 'are-you-kidding-me' look, something you perfected when you were a member of Fairy Tail.

The major spotted us and pointed at us with a shout out of "There they are!" We stood up as the leader looked at every one of us, his gaze lingering particular on Erza and Natsu. He must have heard of (Or chased) them before.

With a flick of his hand we were invited in the room and the major looked pretty dumbfounded as the leader obviously wanting to leave just went into the room again.

Well, we followed them inside.

Once we were inside the rune knight spoke up.

"So you are the mages that took the job to eliminate the guild 'Sensen Rose'."

"Yes we are. Natsu Dragneel, Lucy Heartfilia, Gray Fullbuster and lastly me, Erza Scarlet." Erza replied.

"Fine, fine. Did you succeed in capturing all the twelve members?" Erza nodded shortly.

"Would you give me a short report about it?" Erza looked at me, since I probably knew the most.

"Natsu here took the job first and was ambushed. Then at first, only I came and helped him, and ambushed myself two men, one named Mörder and the other Crusher. We had to fight separately one-to-one fights to make our way up to the strong opponents and the guild master, Slicer. Each of us took four members in this system out but before we could reach Slicer and Coupable, the two at the end, Gray and Erza came and took those two out."

"Mh…" The rune knight rubbed his chin. "Could it be that this system was called Formation Thorn of deathly Afterlife?" "That is right, sir." I confirmed.

"A very nasty Formation which makes the mage weak before turning to the mages he or she actually needs his strength on." With a quick glance on the nearly unscathed Natsu he added "Or some people may see it as a warm-up." Natsu grinned and the Knight allowed letting a smile slip on his face as well.

Although he became serious again the next second.

"Say, is there a mage under the mages you have captured with the name Bowel?" Erza nodded another time.

"Why is that important sir?" I dared to speak up. I was interested why he asked specifically after Bowel.

"Well, firstly, Congratulations, you will get the reward on him of course." There was a reward on a simple mage in a Dark Guild? That was unusual, normally the rewards were sat on mages out of guilds and a reward was set on a guild as a whole.

"Might I ask who defeated him? Maybe you, Mister Dragneel?" Natsu shook his head sharply.

"Nah, didn't do it." "We all did do it; there isn't place for an I in a team." I added. "Teams split up the rewards to equal parts." I explained further.

"Ah well, then the reward shall be given to all of you. I was just curious since we were chasing him for a long time now. You see, this mage is pretty strong, being faster than sound and light, but he is more into ambushing. That is why he always joins a guild and is hiding his true strength until he has the opportunity to fight alone. This way he can make his guild members underestimate him and then he is killing them from behind." He shook his head sadly. "This way he took out many mages, legal and dark ones. His latest goal was Sensen Rose. We are happy that now finally he was stopped. He killed at least 49 people." He said and I paled at his last words. I fought with a guy like that….and he has killed almost fifty people! And…he was eating the innards of his victims…. 49 people died in such a humiliating way!

"49…" Erza next to me breathed. The soldier smiled sadly.

"That is only the number of people from whom we know it for sure but we are thinking that probably the number goes up into the seventies if not more."

Seventies….if not more…. Seventy people died in such a way….he eat seventy people's innards….

I felt how my breakfast was rising. "S'cuse me" I murmured behind my hand and stormed out towards the bathroom, behind me I could still hear the Knight say "So she defeated him."

I heaved out anything that was within my stomach and then crumbled on the wall, suddenly crying.

I was crying over the seventy people who lost their life because of him….about their dignity lost because of him…over Loke, who was nearly killed as well….because of my disgust to him….over how the cuts now felt way more threatening….because of the shock…..over my stupidity to stand open for any attacks to him just like that…..because of the panic now rising when I suddenly realized in what danger I have been that moment when he had me on my hair…..over the other members of Sensen Rose who would have been betrayed….over the misuse of friendship….and lastly because just everything broke over me at once.

All I wanted to do now was being in my bed, reading and having a snoring Natsu next to me with whom I didn't argue just because of something stupid like that. I didn't even remember about what we fought anymore…. Just that I have been stupid enough to fear an awkward situation and fighting was easier! Just because I didn't have the guts to admit to me that I was in love with him and that's it!

I sobbed even harder. It had finally dawned on me. I didn't want to be with anyone in a white picket fence house but I wanted to be with Natsu and stay at the guild! Our relationship wasn't platonic at all… at some point I must have fallen for him, because come on, who can have so much sweetness and couple-situations rained over them without falling?

And I didn't want that stupid flexible, patient, book-loving perfect guy! That was way too boring; I admit that Cana was right on that. And with Natsu on Fairy Tail too, there weren't even boundaries I would have with other guys because I spent all my time with him anyway. And Natsu could be sweet and caring sometimes…like the incident with the Sakura tree.

Another sweetness, couple-thingy making me fall for him.

A hard knock on the door ripped me out of my thoughts and I desperately wished that it wasn't Erza. She was nice and all but she was way tougher than me and she wouldn't understand why I was so down.

"Luce, open the door!" I wasn't sure if I should be relieved that it wasn't Erza or if I should be even more nerve-wrecked because it was Natsu. I opened the door none the less, after I had rubbed a few times over my eyes, ceased the crying as good as I could and braced myself. In the meantime Natsu almost threw the door out of its hinges with his knocks.

The second I opened he slid in the crammed bathroom, threw the door back shut and hugged me. I was shell-shocked because Natsu, who was currently pissed at me, was clinging onto me like dear life.

But when he started to run a hand over my hair I started sobbing again now mostly because of confusion and the other points but to big parts confusion.

Couldn't my life be normal, nice; not full of events no one could predict?

"It's okay, I'm here" Natsu soothed or tried to because I was sobbing even harder now.

He held me there, in this little bathroom that stunk like shit and puke and the sink was pressed against my back, which actually hurt and he was crushing me but eventually I ceased crying and I felt as relieved as I have never been.

I didn't cry anymore but Natsu and I still remained in that position, he hugging my shoulders with one arm and with the other running over my hand and I leaning my head on his chest and clinging on to him like for dear life.

"I don't know what he did, but its okay, I'm here to protect you." Natsu said.

"Didn't that Knight tell you?" I asked rather surprised.

"No, he said it wasn't his secret to tell." If I hadn't been in Natsu already I could have kissed that man now.

"Lucy…please tell me why he is named Bowel. For real, not that crappy flexible shit."

"Just…don't freak out and start burning down things, okay?"

"I can't promise anything."

"Natsu…"

"Okay, I will try my best." That would suffice for now.

"Well, he slices his victims up and well, eats their innards." I said. Surprisingly I didn't have to cry as I said that sentence. Natsu went stiff and the hand halted. I noticed how his body heat went up and he clenched his fist that was resting on one of my shoulder blades.

"Natsu…" I tried to calm him down but the next second I was in the bathroom alone.

I blinked once and then ran after him. In the lobby, Erza and Gray waited for us and as they saw Natsu livid, they of course knew the reason and their faces darkened as well.

"Natsu stay where you are! Calm down! He is already in jail and you will just do him a favor if you kill him!" I screamed.

"I don't care! That is the sickest thing I have ever heard and he will pay for it!"

"He did already pay for it! I fought him too you see?" I yelled. Okay, I had to somehow distract his fury on someone else, otherwise that bastard wouldn't live long enough to say sorry. However I couldn't just distract it on Gray or whoever that would be highly unfair.

"I..uh…was standing totally open in front of him and was aware of that!" I screamed.

"**WHAT?"**came back threefold. Oh crap I forgot about Gray and Erza. But it seemed to work! Natsu was stopping!

"And I didn't dodge his last attack! See?"I pointed at my neck where the small cut was. Natsu finally turned around again and glared at me so hotly I thought I could go up in flames just from that.

"And I fought him with neither my whip nor a spirit, just my fieet" I was about to say fists but that wasn't true, I never fought with fists, I just kicked.

"And I turned my back on him without knocking him fully out!" I said remembering when I flew into Loke's arms after I kicked him in the crotch. Okay from the glares I know got from THREE strong as hell mages, what I was doing here scratched on masochism.

"And I was just a total bitch today morning because I somehow fell for you and am scared of ruining our friendship" I mumbled through my teeth, light enough for no one to hear. Now it was finally out. If I was already confessing all my mistakes, I could at least add this one, probably my biggest one today. It wasn't like anyone would have heard anyway.

I smiled at the secretary looking at me like I was out of my mind.

"The knights must be out of reach now, hai?" She nodded dumbfounded. I looked towards the others, Erza glaring at me, Gray glaring at me, but also somehow smiling a bit as he found out what was on my mind and lastly, Natsu who was gaping at me like a fish, which I didn't expect at all.

"Huh? What's up?" I asked him.

"_That _was all that about?"  
"What?"  
"That is the fucking reason you started fighting?" Oh. MY. GOD. How could I forget that Natsu was a friggin Dragon Slayer easily hearing what I was mumbling? I blushed fifty shades of red and turned around on my heels, straight into the bathroom again.

"OH my GOD How the fucking god could I be so dumb! Lucy, what did you do? You ruined everything!" I ranted over and over close to crying again. Oh god. I seriously didn't do that. Why did I even have to speak it out? Natsu can't read thoughts, why could I not let it rest in my head?  
I just ruined everything! I wouldn't ever be able to speak to Natsu again. I would have to change my name and move, it was so embarrassing! Natsu probably thought now I was a weirdo, falling for someone who didn't have any interest in me at all! Did he wonder now if all those couple-sweety-things we occasionally did were set up? Because they wasn't! I fell for Natsu because of them, yes but I am not some pervert trying to seduce him or whatever and he started it most of the times anyway!

"I ruined it" I whispered.

"You didn't!" I heard from the other side of the door, from which I was so startled I sprang up and hit my head promptly on the sink.

"AAAhhh!" I screamed while clutching my head. Wonderful just another problem more these days.

"Luce! Are you okay!"

"No I'm not you idiot! You scared me so much I sprang against the sink!"

"PFFFFFF-"

"DON'T LAUGH!"I screamed and just then registered what he had said.

"Wait-what do you mean with I didn't?"

"Would you open the door, please? I won't say this through a door." I was totally ashamed to look him in the eye but opened the door deciding I would have to be somewhere near him sooner or later anyway.

"So what?" I asked as he hushed similar to earlier in the little bathroom. Just as I was suddenly hugged and suspected it the least there, this time I suspected the least what was following, because my face was suddenly cradled in his hands and his lips were on mine, a fiery wave coming from his lips onto mine, crawling up my cheeks and my neck, gathering at my belly and sending a spark through my body, from my highest hair to my toes.

I stood shock frozen for about ten seconds, then I began melting against him, the fire in my stomach rising up to flames worthy of an hellfire, but they didn't hurt but complete me. I threw my arms around him, kissing back although I didn't have the slightest idea what I should do, just following the movement of his lips like flame would wave to flame and combine, just so to part and combine again.

We were two and one at the same time, just like the flames of one fire.

As the heat in me rose to the level I thought I couldn't take it anymore, Natsu broke apart, gasping for air.

"Wow." He breathed.

"Uh huh" I answered dazed. That was one hell of a kiss.

"You see why I said you didn't ruin it?"

"Uh huh" I just couldn't believe what happened there, what was that flame thingy?

"Hey Luce, I love you."

"Uh huh" And I'm pretty sure that that in my stomach were the butterflies everyone was talking about.

"Wanna become my wife?"

"Uh huh" But it didn't feel like butterflies! It was hot and churning and just urgh…

"Let's have thirty children and we'll all name then Igneel."

"Uh huh." That was just…wow. Wait a sec…

"Wait what did you say?"

* * *

**Hey, long time no seen! And I mean that. But I always started writing things and then dicarded them...**

**Well, anyways I personally think this has gotten way out of hand (From the fight on EVERYTHING and I mean EVERYTHING was improvised.) And it's too long for a one shot but I couldn't find a cut...**

**I love you for reading this 3 let me know what you think of it, 'kay? Cookies~**


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